


Pain In Our Past

by Spook123



Category: Spooks
Genre: Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-29
Updated: 2016-03-29
Packaged: 2018-05-29 21:46:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 799
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6395092
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Spook123/pseuds/Spook123
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jo stills goes running everyday. As she sprints up the hill and through the forest she tries to clear her mind. Forget about everything that has happened to her. Then one day she meets someone up there.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Pain In Our Past

I was running through the woods, trying to clear my mind and forget about everything that has happened. The images still flash through my mind, of Bosgaurd and the house, the dark room. I hear my breath going in and out, panting, my lungs telling me to stop. My legs ache as I sprint through the trees, they pass in a blur, like everything else in my life. I think of Zaf, I think of Adam. I wish they were still here.   
Then suddenly I hear breathing behind me. I don’t dare to look around. A hand grabs my shoulder, I whirl around and for a second I see his face laughing and sneering at me. Laughing as he torments me. But then it stops the face fades and I see it is Lucas. The new one. The returning one. I know he can understand what I have been through and I know that he wants to talk. But I can’t, I want to keep it all bottled up then let it out my way.   
“What are you doing out here so early”? he says, his breath jagged, like mine.  
“I couldn’t sleep, needed some fresh air, and I could ask you the same question” I knew the answer really, the same as me. Could’t sleep, doesn't want to sleep because of the nightmares.   
“I like the fresh air” he says, smiling “Its a good way to think about things” we start walking together then, both wondering the same things about each other, both not wanting to ask. We have reached the end of the forest path and are out and into the city.   
“Do you want to get some coffee?” he asked, tentatively “Its on me”. I knew he was just being kind, trying to be a friend. So I accepted and we went and got a coffee both still exhausted from the run. We sat down and Lucas looked up at me, with a look of worry.  
“I know its no use asking you if you’re ok but I am asking anyway. I know that blocking everyone out will seem like the best thing to do is but it isn't trust me. Now whats really going on in your head?” so I told him. He just sat there and listened. I told him what had happened. How I had been taken and what had happened. How I had wanted it to all be over. And how Adam had been there for me and cared for me. And how now he was dead I couldn't trust anyone. Lucas just sat there and listened, it was what I needed and it helped. It helped more than bottling everything up.   
I went back to work later that week. Lucas was there and he smiled at me, that was the first time someone had smiled at me in a long time. So then I tried to forget what had happened and got to work. 

5 weeks later  
I was standing on the rooftop smoking when Ros came and found me. It had been a horrible day. We on surveillance at the restaurant function for some bank in the city and Ros and Lucas were undercover. I was waitressing and then a man in glasses turned round. I saw him then standing there, leering at me. I gasped and all my drinks fell to the floor. It was so embarrassing. As she walks over I can see the worry in Ros’ eyes and she is holding an envelope. She gives it to me. Its Bosguards face, his dead face. I remember hitting him, pounding him, Adam pulling me away and then me realising what I have just done. I ran out of the building and Ben took me home. Then I just sat there crying and crying. All those emotions just overwhelm me as I look at that picture. But then I remember he is gone and he can't ever hurt me again. That makes me feel better. Ros’ is talking and I am barely listening. I am barely listening because for the first time since I can fell me self starting to heel.   
When I walk back onto the grid Lucas is there smiling at me and offers his arm for me to take. We walk through the pods and go and grab coffee. Like we did all those weeks back.   
“I’m sorry about today” I apologise “Not really sure what happened” knowing really that he and I knew exactly what happened.  
“Its ok, it happens to the best of us. You just have to remember to never bottle anything up” he replied with a reassuring look on his face. And with that we walked down the steps of Thames house. Both gradually forgetting the feelings of pain in our past.


End file.
